Learning to paint... from a primary school level

Today I decided to finally learn to paint, whilst also slowly losing the tiny bit of sanity I have left at the same time. Because painting is one thing I well and truely SUCK at, and have never made any progress in what so ever. No really, I actually found a painting I did at 7 years old the other day, and it looks no better than this recent attempt:



So I have decided that by the time I turn 20 (just under 2 weeks) I will at least be able to paint a little better than I could at the age of 7. Which probably means losing my temper a LOT and having numerous mental breakdowns until eventually deciding to cut off my ear to see if it actually helps at all.